Stolen Snitches and Candied Kisses
by Hepzibah Smith
Summary: At seventeen, Lily Evans found herself once again thrown into a world she did not understand; this time a triangle of love, lust, and lies. If the boys didn't kill her, Chocolate Frogs certainly would.


A/N: Yeah, this is probably the first and last time you'll hear from me as I hate rambling on and on in these things and truly like to get to the point. This is my first MWPP fic. Ever. That's not an excuse to say they're OCC, but it is a warning that it won't be as possibly canon as you, the reader, is probably used to. Ah well. It's not the first time canon's been warped, and I doubt it'll be the last. But enough about my petty misgivings. Tell me how it is!

"Please tell me that I am not the first female that has been flattered by your amorous attentions, Remus," said Lily with a slight smirk, "I'd think it a pity that more breasts couldn't feel the cold sweat that your hands seem to excrete like lava from Vesuvius."

"You forget yourself, Evans," mumbled Remus, throwing himself into the Head compartment and plopping onto the seat to face the windows, "_You _were the one that couldn't get your badge on your robes. I was simply being a good Samaritan."

Snorting loudly, Lily stepped into threshold of the compartment and settled her hip against the doorway with a wry grin forming on her face. Remus ignored her suggestive conduct by fingering the spine of the tattered letter Lily had thrown at him on the Platform. "Read it all you like, Remy. The name isn't going to change. You've got me right where you want me."

"Mmmm…no, I don't believe he does. There's no whipped cream…no gyrating of hips…no pole dancing…Oh, Moony! That's what we'll put in the west corner of my room! It'll go great with my beanbag of Sally James!"

Smashing the toe of her Mary Janes into the crevice of the door, the redhead whirled around only to meet two large brown eyes centered off by golden specs that shimmered slightly in the morning light. She fell back with a shriek and felt the smooth oak slap the back of her head. Her legs caught her in time to support the head of James Potter as he tumbled gracelessly to the floor.

"Bloody Horntail, Potter!"

"Thank you, Evans. I hope you're alright too," James said, righting his glasses as he climbed to his knees, "You know…I really like you from this angle. There's nothing to yell at me or turn me down…"

A wand appeared at his throat.

"On second thought, every part of you is lovely, dear."

Sighing in annoyance and shoving Lily's letter into his trouser pockets, Remus stood to help his friend away from the fiery witch. "Welcome, Prongs. I assume you can take center stage by your lonesome now?"

"Wait a minute…_Your _room? _Your _beanbag?" said Lily, obviously still furious that her appearance had been disrupted as she picked at her hair and flattened her curls against her lopsided badge repeatedly.

James smiled ruefully, looking to Remus who rolled his eyes, "Don't tell me Moony here was telling you _he _was Head Boy."

Utter disappointment was written on the freckled cheeks of the Head Girl. Her face fell into a disgusted scowl. "Are you trying to tell me that…"

James nodded. Lily stared at Remus as if he had just announced his loyalty to the Dark Lord in a singsong voice while doing a jig. Splaying his hands wide and shrugging his shoulders, he handed the parchment back to Lily with a small nod of thanks. "Just wanted to see what it looked like, I'm afraid. James is indeed correct in his statement. So, you see, I do have you where I want you: within the arms of my best mate."

And with that, he was traveling a few steps down to settle himself into one of the Prefects' compartments. As the students bustled onto the train, the stunned Lily Evans spotted Sirius Black waving frantically to James, Peter Pettigrew's frail thumb protruding behind the mess of black hair blocking him from her view. Wiggling his fingers in a girlish wave, the Head Boy beamed at his friends and pointed at Lily, then himself before puckering up his lips and swaying on the tips of his heels. Shaking with fury, the girl stomped into their - _her _- compartment and slid the door shut as quickly as she could. She rubbed her sore swinging arm lightly and glared at the wall when a swoosh pronounced the triumphant return of her bane.

"You know, I had hoped to get to know you better before moving in with you, but when Remus informed me that you were Head Girl, well, I made my sacrifices," James said, slouching onto the seat beside her. Standing up, twisting about, and making herself comfortable on the adjacent corners of the small space available, Lily looked up to find James looking upset. The sudden change in attitude struck her immediately and silence hung in the air for the first time in their long and winding history.

So peaceful were the moments that both nearly forgot their duties. Lily held her eyes fast onto her letter, though it was now upside down, and James shook himself from his brooding reverie long enough to say, "Prefects are waiting, Evans." Almond-shaped eyes went round with curiosity before bulging in horror. She failed in a search to find something to say, but was slightly relieved when he reached hastily for the door and held it open for her.

"Thank you…James," she said sincerely, smiling at him and blushing at the wide grin that took over his face.

"You are ever so welcome, _Lily_," he said with a slight bow that made her smile linger on her face longer than she would have wished. It was a good feeling, ignoring all of her problems at home and pressures at school. She could not seem to convince her parents that fighting against a deranged Dark Lord was her future. They were much more comfortable handing off their elder daughter to Vernon Dursley who had a promising career in engineering. Lily was much less comfortable about being the only member of the family _not _invited to her sister's wedding. Given, she would conveniently be in school when the service was held, but she could not help but wonder if she would be allowed to travel home just for the occasion. Dumbledore liked her well enough and Slughorn would bellow down the throat of any opposition. The only problem was held in the workload that she would have - both as a seventh year student and as Head Girl. It was a comfort to know that James was trying to condescend to mere mortals such as herself.

Then he had to go and ruin it all by jumping on his flying horse and throwing his thunderbolts around.

"So, I was thinking that you could spend the first Hogsmeade trip with your friends and I with mine, being very generous, mind you, and that the rest we could spend in the company of the other's arms. Of course, we'll have lunch together the first time; I'm sure the boys won't mind unless you bring Meadows along with you…you can't hate them for finding fun in a name like 'Dorcas'."

"James Potter, I would rather date a clabbert than even look at you," she said, knocking at the two prefect doors to alert the occupants of an upcoming entry.

"I'll have you one day, Evans," he replied mystically. Before she could assure him that this would not be so, he had already entered one of the compartments, leaving her alone with what looked to be a full house of Slytherins. Caressing her badge with her fingertips for courage, she pressed against the door and walked in with a resolution that soon faded.

Though both sides of the compartment were packed, it couldn't be more obvious that Severus Snape commanded all the attention. His body stood straighter than the rest, his dark demeanor demanding control and respect. Black eyes flickered up into green and the recognition that would have been all too evident two years ago was gone.

"Evans," he nodded, his voice strangely haughty and hypnotic. She could not help but wonder when the boy in his mother's overgrown coat had disappeared.

"Snape," she returned with a cool tip of her head. Glancing about the compartment at the frowning faces, Lily returned her gaze to the ringleader. "As there are only four prefects per House, I'm having a little trouble seeing how this Slytherin math is working."

"You would," sneered Snape's closest companion, "I'd grant it would take a great deal of brain cells for a Mudblood to count from one to six."

Lily was startled to see Sirius's face pallid and drawn on the rounded skull of Regulus Black. Though she was aware he existed, she also knew that the two brothers no longer played on friendly terms. "And you, Black, are apparently illiterate. 'Prefect Compartment'," she said slowly, as if talking to a small child.

Regulus snorted and looked to Snape, who was listening to the banter with feigned interest. "Tell us what frivolous assistance Dumbledore requires of us and then get out."

Fuming, Lily blinked hurriedly and swallowed the spit that had accumulated in her mouth, "Prefect duties are for Prefects. I'm only going to ask you one more time to-"

"Black and Avery stay," Snape interrupted.

She frowned. "Then I will have to report this breach of conduct to Professor Slughorn."

"Yeh do that, then, Red," said Evan Rosier from his lounging spot on the floor, "I doubt he takes lightly to ya sticking your brown nose where it don't be belonging. And not giving us our orders, at that. Whatever happen' to House unity?"

Fumbling her fingers to the door, she shoot back, "It crawled up and died just like that rat did that lives underneath your nose, Rosier. You'll be receiving your rounds when we arrive at school. Thirty points from Slytherin for disobeying direct orders from the Head Girl."

"And thirty thousand points from Gryffindor for wasting our time with a Slug slut," Regulus cackled as she slammed the door shut.

Shaking her head to rid herself of the countless hexes running through her brain, she peeked into James's compartment and sighed when she realized he was still rambling on about some subject or another. His booming voice followed her as she returned to the Head compartment to regain her composure. Reaching up to her trunk, she pulled out a Chocolate Frog and bit into the legs hungrily. The bitter twang hit her tongue immediately and the chunks of candy bore into her weary senses. She let her fingers dissect the frog's stomach and pull out a card. Righting the picture, she saw a red-haired woman passionately kissing a large fish. Flicking the card aside, she groaned. It was the fifth Mirabella Plunkett in a month. Biting harshly into an eye, she brooded at the knowledge that it was probably also the fifth stone she had gained in a month.

Startled by a shuffle outside the compartment, she stuffed the rest of the Chocolate Frog into her mouth in time to face James looking at her swollen cheeks with a bemused snicker.

"You've got a spot…uhh…_everywhere_."

Her distended mouth moved frantically in wordless fury.

"If I knew you were so hungry, I would have bought you something on the trolley. I don't think they carry Chocolate Giants, though," he said, sitting beside her and giving her a pitied grin, "Come on now, Evans. Chew slowly…that's it. Swallow a little….not so fast…"

She managed to get the last few bits down with the slightest bit of prickling in her throat. When a rough cloth was pressed against her lips, she resisted, but a hand was at her shoulder to quickly hold her in place. Glaring at a smug James, she cringed when he pulled back to reveal the napkin as his tie.

"I could have managed on my own, thanks," she said, throwing one leg over the other and crossing her arms tightly.

"You're welcome, Evans," he replied softly, watching her turned head to make sure she didn't catch the small smile playing on his lips as he looked down at his sullied tie. "You know, I think I'm kind of gonna like being Head Boy. Hanging out with Remus and Kingsley was a blast! How was your conference?"

Lily knew he hadn't realized that the only House representatives missing from his group were Slytherins. The contentment on his face rivaled that of a cat given the creamiest of milks. "It went great."

"Great!" he exclaimed brightly, snuggling firmly into his seat with his left leg daring to graze the space beside her. "You know, I heard we share a bathroom…"

"Separate," she stated quickly, noting the pout on the Head Boy's lips with a snort, "Pity, isn't it, Potter? Now you can't watch me shower every morning."

Sucking in his lower lip, James ruffled his hair and shook his head, "I was thinking nothing of the sort. I had hoped we'd be sharing so that the architecture of the Tower would be stable instead of wider…with the extra bathroom, you know…and then if you burnt yourself drying your hair…I've seen those contraptions Muggles use and they look quite dangerous. Hair fryers. They…I was hoping I could come and help you if…you know…you fried your head or something…"

She didn't even try to subdue the giggles in her throat from coming out. Chuckling a bit in spite of himself, he reveled in the light that had filled those round eyes that had turned the color of shining emeralds.

A sudden snap at the door ruined whatever else the moment might have held for the pair and a round, balding man appraised the two warm cheeks with a look that bordered on pleasure. "Lily, dear! I had wondered where you had run off to when you didn't appear at the party! There've been quite a few to join the ranks of the Slug Club, I'll have you know. There's Crouch…fourth year, stringy little fellow, but Professor Fridget tells me he can pull wonders with that wand of his! Flannery Preston…I saw a taste of her stunning spell in the corridor and I daresay I've yet to shake it off! And Hector Moorhead…don't smirk at me like that, missy! Yes, I finally got him, and about time too. To think his uncle has been running Durmstrang for sixty-five years and I didn't know him at all! Moorhead may be getting along in the years, but I will never forget all the tales about him…I've told you, of course, Lily, about how he fought with that Ironbelly? Magnificent! Page-by-page play in the Daily Prophet! I've still got my signed copy in the parlor…"

"Professor, was there something you needed to tell me?" she pressed in lightly into the reminiscing.

Slughorn stumbled a bit before beaming. "Yes! Yes, there was! Being that you're Head Girl (so proud of you, Lily! So proud!) you and I will be working a tad bit closer. Did you hear that, James? That scoff! Why, my last feeling should be hurt if you weren't willing! You see, I'd like to make this year's meetings to be special. I shall need help thinking up a suitable going-away party."

"She'd be delighted, professor," said James with a grin.

"No I wouldn't! Don't you dare put words into my mouth, James Potter!" she shouted, "Sir, with all due respect, I'm not sure how much work I'll be up to yet."

Flinging his hands in the air and nodding, Slughorn sighed, "I understand, Miss Evans, I understand! I will approach you with the offer at a later date when you will be better able to assess your schedule. But don't think you can throw me off in your last year like some old baggage! No, no!"

With a hearty chuckle and a few more congratulations on the duo's behalf, Professor Slughorn left the compartment and took the cheery air with him. Tension rose from nothing and lingered in the room as the Express chugged ever closer to the castle. Lily wasn't sure if she was more unsettled by constant advances or by silent electricity.

Though she had assumed James would surely say something during the ride, she was slightly disappointed to find him staring off into space, and when she leaned toward him was almost horrified to find he had fallen asleep. _Well, you're no fun. Wait…James Potter not fun? I think I hear the angels singing._

She took the golden opportunity to truly look at him. Of course she had thought about James in a more than friendly light several times during his flirting, but she made it a rule to not stare the boy down, least his head explode from pride. The glasses that had left an imprint on her temple during the scuffle hung askew by one ear. A smile threatened to form on her mouth when she noticed the miniature Snitch adorning the hinges of his lens. He had very feminine eyelashes. And his lips were thick, but not too large; perfect candidates to be termed 'kissable.'

_And I just jumped from his eyes to his lips. Not good, Evans. NOT. GOOD. But his nose is boring…not that a nose can be particularly exciting, I suppose. I've never heard of noses driving women into sexual frenzies, though it's all in personal taste…I mean, he does have a sweet, childish figure. It isn't regal, though, like Severus's, and I've always thought his nose was rather appropriate for his face. Or I have for a while, at least. Just last year…or this year…or over the summer…_

_Or five minutes ago._

The Chocolate Frog in her stomach seemed to squirm in protest of the thoughts. Snape was too far gone for her to think about any more. But that didn't change the fact that she had still lost her best friend to the Dark Lord and was still secretly hoping beyond a hope that he would realize what a mistake he was making. Of course, she hadn't spoken to him since that faithful day that he'd dared to sleep outside the Fat Lady's portrait, but she couldn't ignore him, couldn't ignore all the things they had shared together. Maybe he could break off their friendship with no feelings, but she couldn't. He was always so good at straightening her head out about Potter, and now that he was gone, she'd had to let her mind take in every compliment as it came. When Snape was there, she had reasons not to go out with James. Now her reasoning was running out.

"Beautiful, isn't it?" said James, waking her from her stupor to give him a blank look, "My face. You've been giving me the most delicious ogle for over fifteen minutes now."

"In your dreams."

"No, we're much more active in my dreams. Don't take it like that, Evans! I just meant you aren't so judgmental there. When I tell you that you look beautiful, you thank me instead of hexing my remembralls off," he said, seeming to search her hands for any evidence of a wand.

"Repetition is often a sign of falsehood," she said quietly.

He pondered her words for a moment before righting his glasses and studying the ceiling, "Repetition is often a sign that one has no idea how to do these types of things properly and so is stuck with saying the natural things."

Snorting in spite of her flushing cheeks, she leaned closer to the window, her heart quickening its beat when familiar fauna began to outline the scenery. "I have trouble believing that you of all people don't know how to do 'these types of things properly,' as you put it."

"Because wanting to snog you senseless and wanting to introduce you to my parents requires two very different tactics."

"Hogwarts," she announced with a dim flutter of her lashes.

"You're ignoring the subject," he said, frowning.

"I'm only ignoring it when you're addressing it, so let's both drop it."

"Drop what?"

"The subject."

"What subject?"

"The one we were talking about."

"Which was?"

"I hate you, Potter."


End file.
